I could not remember the name, and now I have found you and I'm glad. I married that critical boyfriend and then seven years later divorced him for being critical. I thought the relentless criticism was ok because he was not yelling. I thought it was my problem for being defensive, for being bothered by it. Eventually, I came to see the relentless critique of my actions every day was abusive.
but when I wrote these things I could not see that. And because I didn't see it my friends probably couldn't either.
